A change in priorities

Despite my best efforts, I’ve often felt like my life was shaped by forces beyond my control, almost as if I was cast into a mould long ago. This need to fit in stemmed from a deep, hidden sense of insecurity that has been with me since childhood.

As I entered adulthood, particularly after university, I was fortunate to find a close-knit group of friends—my tribe. We’ve stayed connected over the years, and they’ve been a significant part of my life. Yet, even with such a supportive circle, I lacked a clear sense of direction. I had no real idea of what I wanted to achieve or how I wanted to shape my future.

Work provided me with opportunities to travel frequently—to the US, Spain, and even India. These trips allowed me to indulge my curiosity, exploring new places and temporarily satisfying my wanderlust. But when I was home, life felt stagnant. My twenties were a blur of video games, unhealthy habits, and a general sense of drifting. I wasn’t taking care of my body, my mind, or my future.

Then, my thirties arrived, a decade many dread, seeing it as the end of youth. But for me, it signaled the chance for something different. I embraced the changes—meeting my incredible partner, buying our first home, and adopting two cats. It all felt like progress, but still, I couldn’t shake the nagging question: “What’s next?” I thought a new job or a promotion might be the answer. But there was always a voice in the back of my mind saying, “I’m only 30; I have time.”

Then came a moment that changed everything. While watching an episode of The Bear—specifically episode seven, titled Forks—something clicked. The show is fantastic, and I highly recommend it, but this episode in particular resonated with me on a deep level.

In the episode, Richie, a man in his forties, is struggling. He feels lost, like life has passed him by, while those younger than him seem to be thriving. In the high-stakes kitchen where Richie finds himself, a simple phrase is painted on the wall: “EVERY SECOND COUNTS.”

As the story unfolds, we learn that this phrase carries a personal significance. The restaurant’s owner, played brilliantly by Olivia Colman, shares that her father used to sign off his travel journals with these words. The full story is never revealed, leaving the viewer—and Richie—with a powerful, lingering thought: live every day fully, don’t waste a moment.

That message hit me hard. It was as if someone had flipped a switch in my mind. I was so moved that I wrote the date I watched the episode on my office wall, a permanent reminder of that shift in perspective.

Almost immediately, I found myself letting go of things that once consumed me. Video games, social media, mindless entertainment—they all lost their appeal. Instead, I started focusing on what truly matters to me and how I want to spend my time.

I came to a realisation: my job doesn’t define me, and chasing promotions won’t bring me happiness. What I want is to live intentionally, to use my resources and time to build a life that aligns with my true desires.

So, what does that life look like? I’m not entirely sure yet. But that’s where the excitement lies—in the journey of discovery, in making every second count.